The gift you've all been searching for!

Have no fear my friends. Wal-Fart has the gift that you've all been searching high and low for. You can stop worrying about whether or not you will find one before Christmas gets here. Trust me...they have PLENTY! So hurry up and go grab it and put your worries to rest. Your furry friends will thank you.

Just for clarification, please read this post with a sarcastic tone.