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Wednesday, June 29, 2011

We Want to Know Wednesday!







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Do I still have readers out there?  I've been HORRIBLY LAZY at the Impulsive household.  In between my 12 day trip to the North Pole (aka Michigan), my 11 day sickness, trips to Mom's pool to work on my tan, quitting a drama-filled job and my brothers upcoming wedding in 2 weeks, I haven't wanted to spend much time on the internet lately.  Forgive me?

I love our Wednesday link up and I almost forgot I was in charge of the questions this week!  *beats head on wall*  But I managed to get them typed up and sent to my lovely and understanding co-hosts Janette, Mamarazzi and Shawn.

This week, I want to know:



1. What was the last thing you searched for online?
2. If we visit your home state, what is one MUST we should do before leaving?
3. What do you think pharmaceutical companies should invent a pill for that isn't on the market yet?
4. When was your first kiss? Was it good or bad?
5. What is your guilty pleasure tv show that you can not miss?


1. The last thing I searched for online was pinterest. I joined, I looked around, and I commented but I still don't get it.  Enlighten me people!  I'm a complete follower and want to be one of the cool kids but I feel like a complete idiot trying to figure out what the big deal is all about.


2. If you're going to visit the great state of Oklahoma, I say you need to visit the maximum security state prison to see what NOT to do while you're here. Don't worry.  Most of them don't have teeth so they can't bite you. Or if that's not what you had in mind, you should visit the Oklahoma City Memorial (no thanks to Timothy McVeigh and Terry Nichols--bastards). Bring tissues. It makes me tear up every time I visit. 


3.  There needs to be a pill for stupid people.  Like for the idiots who have meth labs in their house with their children present, or the swingers who pick up STD's every other week and then brag about it in the Hellmart check out line, or the stupid girl who was texting while driving and ended up in the ditch. Seriously.  These people need a pill to fix them. Or a pill that cures all cancer. That would be even better! Can I get an amen?


4. My first kiss took place when I was 12 (I think).  We both had braces, I had NO IDEA what I was doing with my tongue and I was super scared our braces would interlock and I would be stuck to him forever. Do you know what my daddy would have done to him? So I'm gonna say that it wasn't a great experience for either one of us.  Good try Mike H.  You get an A for effort!

5. It's no secret that I am a reality tv junkie.  I recently joined an "I'm addicted to reality tv" self-help group and my treatment plan is going well.  I've dwindled my favorites down to Bachelor/Bachelorette/Bachelor Pad, Real World, Big Brother, American Idol, Sister Wives and the my latest addiction, {Strange} Sex on TLC.  It's a hot mess and I can't get enough.  Visit HERE to see short clips of this train wreck of a show.  Or better yet...don't because you will be addicted to watching it too and then you'll blame me.


*Question #4 is brought to us by Amber and Nadine. 
*Question #5 came from Vandy.  
Thanks pretty girls! =)


These questions are super EASY!  Link up and join the fun!  Several of these ladies visit almost everybody and we all love comment love, right? (If you leave me a comment, I will return the favor.  I PROMISE!)


Happy Hump Day my friends!

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Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Did You Know?

Did you people know that you can request a FREE credit report online every year? I didn't either until last summer. It was the BEST thing that I ever did! You can see EVERYTHING


Have you been late on a loan? It will tell you. 
Have you missed a mortgage payment? It will tell you. 
Who are the people looking at your credit score? It will tell you.


But the reason why I did it was because I was the victim of credit card fraud and it scared the shiz out of me. It was a learning experience. Luckily, my report was ok and my amazing credit card company didn't allow the charges to go through. Thank you random Japanese man who almost ruined my credit. 


One thing that bothered me was M's credit score was higher than mine. I'm now on a mission to change that because everything is a competition to me, ya know?


I knew that our credit score mattered when we purchased our homes but I didn't know that your credit scores could be used to evaluate applications for credit, insurance, employment or renting a house.


So, friends, I suggest that you look online to check for a free credit score offer and of course to view your credit report.  You may be surprised at what you find on there......like when I saw my name on an ex-boyfriends credit card that I didn't even know existed. True story.


You.are.welcome.
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Flippy Floppy Love


My IRL friend, Becca, hosted her 3rd Annual Flip Flop Exchange and I couldn't pass it up!  Who doesn't love flip flops?  

My partner was Paige and she sent me the cutest flips!  I LOVE LOVE LOVE them! See?
They have the most comfortable sole ever! She also wrote me a super sweet note.  I love finding new bloggy friends!  

Of course I put them on immediately and modeled them for the camera because that's what I do... 


A perfect fit!  Thanks again Paige!  I love them!

Do you have a favorite pair of flip flops that you love? What's the brand?  

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Monday, June 27, 2011

Making Changes

I LOVE our furniture.  It's brown leather and has really held up well since Emma popped into the picture but we've had it for YEARS!  Maybe I should move things around to change things up a bit. 


Wait.  Then I'll have to do extra cleaning. That's out.


Maybe I'll just buy something else and sell our old furniture. I'm just ready for something like a leather tufted sofa or maybe some antique white bar stools for the kitchen.  Just something different. 


Do you ever get sick of looking at the same furniture?
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Friday, June 24, 2011

Friday Confessional 6*24*11

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What a week! I am still trying to get over a severe sinus infection that came at the same time as my strep.  Luckily, I'm on the mend and enjoying some pool time today!


I have a few confessions for you this week.

Ready? Ok. <----This soooo sounds like a cheerleader when I read it in my head. I think I'm still bitter for not making the squad in 7th grade.


I confess that I'm pretty sure I have a flippin' yeast infection from the stupid antibiotic. I have a very "uncomfortable" feeling down south in my girly bits section. (Sorry boys!) 

I confess that I am super excited about GNO with my bitches JK, Mona, and Rhonda. We will be celebrating that Rhonda's son, Cason, doesn't have CANCER!! SUCK ON THEM APPLES CANCER! Ding! Ding! WE WIN. YOU LOSE.  I see Captain in my near future. *CHEERS*

I confess that I ate this on Wednesday night:
No, I didn't eat it all.  I was just craving a mixture of things and M wasn't home so why not? DON'T YOU JUDGE ME!

I confess that I hopped back on the couch to 5K train this week for the first time in 11 days.  It was painful but I did it.  But guess what happened during my last minute of running?  I had to poo.  THANK GOD I was right in front of my house.  I ran in, did my business, and ran right back out the front door for one more minute of running before I cooled down.  Exercise and HellMart help me poo every.flippin'.time.  Lovely, right? 


I confess that I QUIT MY JOB!!! Remember the affair and all the drama? Well I eliminated it. Yay me!! Now if I could just find another part time job that let's me work my own hours from the comfort of my own home.....

Wanna read more confessions? Go see Mamarazzi. She's the hostess with the mostest.

Now, give me your best confession for the week. I need something to read while I'm laying poolside.

Happy Friday friends~

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Wednesday, June 22, 2011

We Want To Know Wednesday

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It's Wednesday again?  Wow.  The summer can slow down any time now.  Time flies when you're having fun!  

Janette, Mamarazzi, Shawn and myself would like to say THANK YOU to all of our faithful linkers.  You guys make us happy! =)  We LOVE that you love to link up weekly.  

*If you would like an email sent to you on Monday with the questions, let me know.  I'm a planner so I get it.

This week, the questions come from my IRL pal Shawn.  She wants to know:


  1. What is the best or worst pick up line you have ever been given?
  2. What is your most and least favorite day of the week?
  3. How many hours of sleep do you require each night?
  4. Is there a song that takes you back in time? What song is it and what memory is it attached to?
  5. What is your biggest guilty pleasure?


1.  "What has 142 teeth and holds back the incredible hulk? My zipper."  Or how about "Did you fart? Because you just blew me away."
2. Favorite Day--Saturday 
    Least Fav--Monday
3. I REQUIRE 7-8 to function properly and remain sober enough to raise my daughter but I only get an average of 5 because my brain won't shut down at night. When I take any kind of sleep aid, I see things that aren't there, I say weird things, and my vision goes whack and to top all that goodness off, then I wake up feeling like I only slept for an hour so no recommendations please.  I've tried almost everything.  The only thing that works is getting drunk and passing out.


4. Oh wow. So many songs take me back. Baby Got Back, Gin and Juice, Ice Ice Baby, Boys in da Hood, Humpty Dance.  Do you see a pattern here?  But the main song would be our "first dance" wedding song which was Aerosmith's Don't Wanna Miss a Thing.




5. For me, my biggest guilty pleasure is treating myself to a spa day (and not the spa day that I blogged about here). I love getting pampered in any way (except when they yank the towel away from me and leave me standing nekkid like a scared little kid.) Massage me, give me a facial, mani me, pedi me, wax me, tweeze me, rub me, etc.  I'll take it all! Well...except for the happy ending stuff.  I don't roll that way.


Link up with us and leave some comment love too so we can return the favor!  


HaPpY HuMp DaY!


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Monday, June 20, 2011

Ain't nothin' but a FROG thing

Hi friends!  I miss you oh so much!  Things are ca-razy over here....scandalous activities are taking place and somehow I got in the middle of it.  Drama follows me EVERYWHERE! 


Very looooong story short:


I work from home.  I work for a doctor who is 40, married to a beautiful woman and has 6 lil childrens all homeschooled by the wife that just gave him new boobies.  He started having an affair with the 21 year old that works in his office who has no boobies.  "Call girl" has been on ALL of his business trips this year and has performed sex acts (think kitty cat) for him.  And she also got some bonus money.  I guess she needed to be paid for her fetish works of art.  Anyway, Wifey found out (GOOD FOR HER!!!) and I'm getting blamed for telling her...or so that's what he's telling his wife.  I was planning on quitting when the rumor was confirmed but it sounds like if I stay, he's gonna fire me and I get a severance package! You just gotta love my small town and all the crack whores and gossip.


Between hundreds of text messages via the Boss and another co-worker, I'm just exhausted. And I've been doing some traveling and not enough blogging.  I'm hoping to get better but I will not be home on any weekend until the end of July so I'm not making any promises.


Here is what Emma and I are doing today:


We are practicing our swimmin' moves and tanning ourselves in the FROG pool today.  It's very relaxing.  Anybody wanna join us?  There's a little grass and some pee in the water but the bathroom is too far away for me to get out.


I'll be back on Wednesday for We Want To Know. In the meantime, I want to know....have you ever been in the middle of such drama with a co-worker?  


VERY IMPORTANT PS.
Remember my friends 4 year old twin with the tumor that the doctor said was malignant?  Well guess what?  It's not.  It's benign! NANA-NANA-BOO-BOO CANCER!  YOU SUCK!!!  The power of prayer is an amazing thing, so if you were praying for Cason, it worked.  =)




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Wednesday, June 15, 2011

We Want To Know Wednesday

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It's Wednesday already?  Wow.  What a week!  I played hard in the pool this weekend {read: I tanned my white azz on a floating mattress in the water for 3 days straight} and then I got the sickies.  I hate the sickies...especially when its name is STREP THROAT.  And Emma Kate has a double ear infection.  So here I am, on what feels like my deathbed, to answer these questions brought to you by Mamarazzi.  


{1} You have been asked to give a 10 minute speech to teenage girls. What is it about?
{2} Do you have a pet? Tell us about them. No pets? Why?
{3} What is the biggest inconvenience about the place you’re currently living?
{4} What do you think is the single best decision you have made in your life so far?
{5} What are the THREE "nevers" of your life? (things you would never do or have never done)


Q2 is brought to us by McKenzie
Q3 is brought to us by DateGirl


1). Speech--I would tell them that:
    a) Sex is overrated.
    b) All boys have STD's and aren't afraid to share.
    c) You will NOT become famous for being a teenage mom no matter what MTV says.
    d) Don't be mean to your momma.
    e) Wear longer shorts.


2). Pet--Our first child was a precious Beagle named Lexi. She was our "practice baby".  Lexi is 7 years young and she loves loves loves baby Emma. She has been the most perfect dog I've ever had.


For several years, we had a Packers collar on her {because we're Cheeseheads} but after EVERYONE in the 'hood referred to her as a "him", I finally traded it in for a pretty pink one. Problem solved.


3). Inconveniences--I guess we could start with the fact that my town, which I lovingly refer to as HELL, has the biggest group of swingers that I've ever seen.  Or the fact that this town could be the Meth capital of Oklahoma.  Or how about that I paid a ridiculous amount of money for my house because the price of land in this shitastic town is outrageous. Or the fact that it doesn't have a Taco Bueno and only offers 2 chain restaurants.  We have 20,000 people!  WE NEED RESTAURANTS! 
*End of rant*


4). Single best decision--Hmmm...I have several.  I make amazing decisions on a regular basis, DUH. Even as a teenager, RIGHT MOM?  But the BEST was embracing my fear and letting my fertility doctor cut me open and drain cysts from my ovaries thus allowing me to get pregnant with my little miracle baby, Emma Kate. 


5). Nevers:
    a) I will NEVER snort anything up my nose.  It's an exit only.
    b) I will NEVER be a swinger even if I live in Swingerville.
    c) I will NEVER quit loving slightly underbaked brownies.


So now it's your turn!  It took me all of 15 minutes to type this up so get busy!  And don't forget to visit my partners in crime Janette, Mamarazzi, and Shawn.


P.S.  On a more serious note, two of our best friends just found out that one of their 4 year old twin boys has a tumor on his hip.  The doctor believes it's malignant.  They will be taking a biopsy today.  If you believe in the power of prayer like I do, please please please pray that this a non-cancerous tumor.  We already have one best friend who has gone through chemo with her 1 year old. I just can't imagine watching another set of friends go through the same heartbreak. Thank you in advance.
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Links must lead to WWTK posts that contain the WWTK button. Posts should lead to Family Friendly blogs. Blogs containing explicit language and/or sexually explicit content should contain an "adult content warning"or risk being removed from the link list.

Friday, June 10, 2011

Friday Confessional 6*10*11

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Do you know that every single time I link up with Mamarazzi for a Friday Confessional, I feel a ton of relief almost instantly? It's like when you have to use the bathroom so bad but you have to wait until Friday to use it and when you finally sit down to relieve your poor full bladder, all is right with the world again and you can think about something other than peeing. Just try it. You'll see what I mean.

No, don't try the "holding your pee until Friday" thing.  Just the confession part.

I confess that I'm not feeling like blogging much lately.  I blame summertime. And the fact that I'm feeling lazy.  I have LOTS of embarrassing things to talk about but I don't feel like taking the time to write them all down.

I confess that one of those embarrassing things might have happened at the White Trash Wedding Bash that I attended when I went to the North Pole last weekend.  It was catered by Kentucky Fried Chicken and 10 minutes after saying "I do", the bride and groom {and wedding party} were at a bar down the street getting wasted before the KFC reception.  I have a pic.  Wanna see?


That is classy, no?  Hey!  She wasn't scared. I think it's awesome.

I confess I was impressed that M was showing his moves out on the dance floor for the first time in our 11 years together.  First with Emma {sober}:
FATHER/DAUGHTER DANCE: Butterfly Kisses
And later on, after consuming some adult beverages, he showed his moves to me:
Gettin' LOW
I confess that I'm gonna get sappy.  Ready?  

This picture melts my heart:
She is making a wish.  I hope it comes true!
And finally, 

I confess that Emma and I will be doing this ALL WEEKEND LONG at Nana and Papa's house:
Yes she DOES has a bathing suit and yes she'll be wearing it this weekend.  SWEARSIES!

Oh, and here's me in my new bathing suit.  What do ya think? Is it too modest?
I lie sometimes.

So, what's on your mind?  Any confessions for me today? You know I'm all ears!

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Wednesday, June 8, 2011

We Want To Know Wednesday!



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It's HUMP DAY which is one of my favorite days of the week. It's also time for another edition of WWTK!  It's our nosey questions that we want you to answer so we can stalk you to the best of our ability.

Janette has provided this weeks questions for us and here they are:
  1. Everyone seems to have a quirky family situation-- what is something unique about your family dynamic?
  2. What is the most stressful aspect to blogging (aside from the network going down)?
  3. We all end up on a blog at some point in our day, but name your top 3 favorite websites you flock to daily (non blog)!
  4. What’s your sign?  Believe in it or not, does any part ring true to you?
  5. IceCream!! ICECREAM!! We all scream for icecream! Name your favorite flavor/brand! (Its hot here, can't help it)
BONUS QUESTIONS
A.  Name the blog you credit for linking up with us today?
B.  Suggest a question you want to see in future WWTK’s!


1. Unique dynamic--The first thing that comes to mind is M's middle name is the same as my maiden name which is Oliver. I hated Oliver as my last name growing up but if we ever have a boy, I'm quite certain that his middle name will be Oliver since it's in our family on both sides.  And for the record, M wanted to name Emma CHESTER (as in Chester the molester?) if she were a boy so you can rest assured that I will be picking out the names from now on.
2. Blogging Stress--I think for me it's when I have to blog sober. Okay...or the fact that I can't always get around to reading my favorite blogs on a daily basis. But I do visit your page if you leave me a comment.  I make that a priority. But I miss commenting on the blogs that don't visit me. (I still read them in my google reader though).
3. Top sites--(1) Twatter to stalk my peeps (some say twitter. Whatev) (2) Facebook to stalk my "friends" (3) My bank and credit card sites (to stalk M's spending habits!)  So see? I'm a complete stalker.  It's not a misconception. I really am. 
4. My sign--I'm a capricorn and I NEVER EVER read my horoscope. It talks about my least favorite planet, Saturn, and Earth being my "element" and goats climbing higher but there is never any mention of drinking Patron margaritas or Captain and Coke so it confuses me.  
5. Ice Cream-- I don't dig ice cream.  DON'T YOU JUDGE ME PEOPLE!  Now listen...I did chow down on some kind of vanilla/chocolate twist cone while visiting the North Pole last week and it was pretty good but it's nothing compared to a pan of slightly undercooked brownies fresh from the oven. 
There ya have it, friends.  Short and sweet!  Don't forget to visit my co-hosts Shawn, Mamarazzi and Janette. If you're linking up, don't forget the bonus questions!

*Please remember to grab our cute little button up there and link all the hosts names to your post, ok Lovies?


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Links must lead to WWTK posts that contain the WWTK button. Posts should lead to Family Friendly blogs. Blogs containing explicit language and sexually explicit content should contain an "adult content warning", or risk being removed from the link list.

Tuesday, June 7, 2011

WINNER WINNER CHICKEN DINNER and more...

FRIENDS!!! Oh how I've missed you! I'm home from my winter vacation to the North Pole....aka Michigan.  It was 90 degrees on the day we left.  THE HELL YOU SAY!  However, there was a new gorgeous purse and some makeup products waiting on my door step so I was instantly happy!  I love online shopping.


Ok, so I should be doing the monthly Vlog for June but I'm a loser recovering from the redneck wedding I attended on Saturday which was interesting yet entertaining.  More on that later.  If you love stalking watching vlogs like I do, go visit Shawn and Mamarazzi.


Now, on to the contest that we blogged about last week from our blogger meet-up trip to Austin.  We have a winner!!!  Many thanks to BECCA for making another awesome video for us to show you! I already miss my new IRL friends Becca, Jen, Shawn, and Viv.  I'm so glad that I see JennyKate on a regular basis. Whew! 


(BTW...Becca does this as a business if you're interested! Maybe a Fathers Day gift?)




A Winner in Austin!! from Rebecca Darling on Vimeo.

Congratulations to Andrea from My Chihuahua Bites ! We will be sending you our Austin gifts in the mail very soon!


Come back tomorrow to link up for We Want To Know Wednesday.




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Friday, June 3, 2011

Friday Confessional 6*3*11

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It's time for one of my favorite memes hosted by the one and only Mamarazzi....FRIDAY CONFESSIONAL!  It cleanses my soul and for good reason.  I usually slip in a really juicy one. So, let's get started.

I confess that I had the BEST time meeting up with fellow bloggers JennyKate, Shawn, Viv, Becca and Jen at the Austin Is Weird blogger meet up a couple of weeks ago. Did you see that crazy video?  Becca has mad video making skills! These crazy girls were SO MUCH FUN to hang out with and I can't wait for ROUND 2! If you don't follow them, you should.

I confess that I learned from Viv that the way to cure hiccups is to light matches, drop them in water, and then drink the water.  {It didn't work for me because I wasn't "doing it right"}.

I confess that I found it bizarre that it's ok to have sex on dancefloors in Austin.

I confess that part of my entertainment came from JK's intoxicated tweets and her random quotes throughout the weekend.

I confess that because nobody would let me use their restroom after closing time (and the nasty urinal that I was willing to use was locked), I totally peed in the parking lot while Shawn was on the lookout for pervs trying to catch a peek. Look, I HAD TO GO! Annnnd...I might have peed a little bit on my shoes.

I confess that I love love love looking at our pics from Austin.  Here are some of my favs:
Aren't they all so beautiful?
JK is marking her territory! ;)

I'm assuming Jen is taking the pic?



Way too many root beer shots were consumed

Our fabulous brunch at Max's..home of waffles and chicken

I confess that I grabbed lots of boobs while in Austin.  Apparently, I'm a boob girl.


But I wasn't the only one....


So, whatcha got to confess today?  Just tell me one little juicy one. I won't tell ANYBODY.  Swearsies.

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