Monday, October 1, 2012

I'm Talking About My Vacay to Florida

Hey lovies! It's time to TALK TO US! Are you in? 

I've got plenty to say about my trip to Florida to see my hilarious co-host, SS. As promised, here are all the deets from my last hoorah before baby no-name arrives!

I started off the trip on the right leaving my luggage in the garage. Yep. I discovered it when I was 45 minutes into my 1.5 hour drive to the airport {because HELL doesn't have one of those}. I sobbed BIG UGLY MESSY TEARS for over 20 minutes. M says to buy some new clothes when I get there. I thought I'd save some money by having my mom overnight my items to Florida. When my mom called to tell me she got them shipped and that I owed her $188, I cried a little more. $188 DOLLARS??? That's just WRONG. Lesson learned: Buy new clothes when you get to destination IF YOU FORGET YOUR LUGGAGE.
My $187 box arrived as promised.

As I sit waiting patiently for my flight to depart, my day gets better as I hear the dreaded words: "We are delayed due to a technical difficulty". ARE YOU KIDDING ME AMERICAN AIRLINES? So, THREE HOURS LATER {and I mean that I sat on the PLANE for 3 hours}, we take off on our 2.5 hour flight.

Upon arrival, we head straight to the mall to buy clothes for the next day. I forgot panties so we hit up the local Hellmart for some of those and a bottle of wine. I'm not even joking and don't you dare think about judging me. 

Our mexican dinner was delicious...especially this:
Oh chill out. I just had a tiny sip of Shawn's marg.

The funniest part of my first evening was the gift that she gave me. She bought me a nightgown. Let me introduce you to my very first Moo Moo:
It was big enough for another person.
I plan on wearing it tonight in the boom boom room. I think M will like it.

My luxury suite at the Seriously household was acceptable. I would definitely stay there again. I give it a 5 star rating.

The next morning, I woke up to cankles. I blame American Airlines for making me stay on a plane for over 5 hours.

We headed out to breakfast and a trip to the local spa for massages and facials. This fat pregnant girl enjoyed every.last.minute of being pampered!

We did some shopping....

And bought Shawn a new grill....
And thought about buying Shawn this amazing headpiece...
Because clearly, she can ROCK it! Ultimately, we decided she better save it for another occasion.

At the end of day 2, I am still rocking some amazing cankles.

I got my phone highjacked by a guy named Babe. Apparently, my background picture of Emma was in need of replacement.

We watched some girls play some softball and then I posed for a nice picture with Peanut. Isn't she sweet? I'm pretty sure she wasn't wearing deodorant. 

Have you ever wanted to know what Shawn does during a softball game?
She plays on her ipad...THE WHOLE GAME. Ok, so she's keeping score on an ipad app, but whatever. Look at that intensity! 

I learned MANY things during my trip to Florida. One of many things that I learned is that Shawn is ok putting passengers lives in danger. Proof:

That's right, people. SHE PUTS ON MAKEUP IN THE CAR WHILE DRIVING. And don't get me started on her texting while driving. I never felt safe. I was ready to take over the wheel at any given time just in case.

I also learned that they throw parties at the last minute. Hosting a party stresses me out but it's just another "normal" day at the SS household. I'm assuming that having said parties makes Babe excited enough to rub his nipples and show off the 6 pack that he wishes he had.

The weekend brought on more softball in the form of a tournament. I thoroughly enjoyed watching some girls play softball. Even Honey took time out of her busy social calendar to come out and watch!
I'm like the slightly older sister she never had.

While driving to the softball field, I learned what makes Shawn horny: Motorcycles going 120 mph on the highway. We had to pull over so she could change out her panties.

A couple other interesting tibits learned:
*Babe's "manhood" is referred to as "Willis and the Doodleberries".
*The dogs know how to open unlocked doors...even while you're showering and sleeping...and they will make you scream like a 10 year old girl when they "surprise" you.

I'd like to thank this girl...
...for plucking the long, black hair from my neck while at a birthday party for their friend. It was the icing on the cake! I'm sure I made a lasting impression as they think back on that night.....

On my 5th and final day of my Florida vacay, I realize I will miss this view every day:

But I know I'm always welcome into their home because they made me feel like a part of the family. Farting, burping, sibling arguments, etc all made me feel right at home!

It was a great vacation! Thanks Shawn! I'm looking forward to showing you all that TULSA has to offer next year. I know you're so excited. I mean, after all, we only have dirt roads, cowboys and lots of animals roaming on farms but I'll show you a good time anyway. Until we meet again my friend....

What are you TALKING about this week? Let us know by linking up your Tuesday post! Have a great week!




Red Stethoscope said...

OK, I'm still getting over the $188 for overnight shipping! Whaaa? I will most definitely just buy new clothes wherever I am!

P.S.- You're the cutest pregnant woman ever and you ROCK a XXXXL mumu, you sexy beast!

Shawn said... covered almost everything! It's 10:51 and I have not even started to think about my post...I suck big time! The good news is, there's really no need for me to even write a covered almost everything!

I love you girl, like the slightly younger sister I never had;)

Yogi♪♪♪ said...

Looks like you had a good time, glad to see that you didn't embarrass us back here in Oklahoma. Now back to life in HELL!!!!

middle child said...

Glad you had such a wonderful time! We are in the planning stages for our Fl. trip. Where you stayed reminds me of the house we rented last year. This time I insist on a heated pool. I don't care what it costs!

Daisy said...

Too bad you forgot your luggage but you got an AMAZING nightgown out of it ;)
Love it, hahahha.

Stacie said...

You gals know how to pack the fun in! And I am pretty sure that cankles come standard issue with muumuus....

allstarme said...

Looks like a lot of fun; Florida is awesome, right??

Stacy Uncorked said...

Holy cow - $188 overnight charge would have bought you a plethora of those classy mu mu's. ;)

You both are so stinkin' cute - never a dull moment when you two hang out, is there?

Princess Nagger loves those Grillz - I'll have to let her know that Shawn likes 'em like a 9 year old. ;) You totally should have bought that headpiece though - she does rock it. Christmas is coming! ;)

Crazy Christmas in September, Maytag and Oster Rock, and a Pessimistic Princess Nagger

Nadine Hightower said...

love it. She has blended you right into the family... she's a good friend.

Nicole said...

I would miss that view too! And looks like you had an action packed weekend or week I guess :)

VandyJ said...

Looks like a rocking good time. And hey, the muumuu fit right?
Looking forward to the rocking time you'll show Shawn next year.

Chell said...

Awwww sounds like a fun trip! Ummmm yeah, next time, new clothes....
Just saying! :)

Jill said...

I love this post. You & Shawn always seem to have such a blast together... it makes me wish I'd been there!!!

And I recognize that look of concentration... I never had an iPad to scorekeep with, but I used to be a pro scorekeeper. Trust me, you've got to be GLUED to it!! So easy to make a mistake!!

sarita edgerton said...

Sounds like you were a member of the family!

MiMi said...

You guys BOTH kill me!!
Willis! And the DOODLEBERRIES!!!!
AAAAAAAHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAAHAA! I can't comment on anything else because that is stuck in my head!!

Miss Angie said...

I was going to tell you to keep rocking that moo moo, but I can't do it with a straight face... lol I'm not sure I could do it with a gay face either, but that's a different story!

Glad you had a good time!

Jessica McCoy said...

$188! OMG!! I've never flown but between the news and your post here I know never to fly AA. Crazy! And if I ever lose my luggage I will for sure just buy new clothes.

Sounds like y'all had a great time!! Love that pool!

Heathers Happenings said...

You are smoking hot in that moo moo ��glad you guys had a great time.

Steph said...

I like the moo moo. I bet M did too!

Sounds like you had a fantastic time! Yay!

Sarah Kate said...

Oh my gosh...Willis and the Doodleberries?!?! I am DYING!!!!!! That is hilarious!!!!

I'm so glad you had fun, even with an $188 shipping bill. Grrrr.

Mrs. Match said...

Looks like you had a great time! I would NOT feel safe riding passenger either. Eep! Bad Shawn, bad!

That is a kickass moo moo. Wear it to delivery-the nurses will laugh their asses off!

Becca @ R We There Yet Mom? said...

That sounds like a WONDERFUL vacation - you & Shawn are a match made in heaven!!!


Emmy said...

So sorry about the luggage- I would totally cry too. And then with how long you were sitting on the plane your mom could have gone back home and got it for you! I hate hate when there are delays where you end up stuck on the plane- I would much rather be stuck in the terminal!

My sister used to do her makeup like that while driving- crazy ladies.