April Awesomeness

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Hello lovies!  I hope you had an AMAZING weekend! It's that day of the week where Seriously Shawn and myself peer pressure ask you to join in with our super cool linky party that has no rules! We love reading you every week! 


Once a month, I love participating in Emmy Mom's 10 Things To Smile About link party. It gives me an opportunity to brag about whatever I want and you have to suffer through it. HA! Pure genius on my part, right?


1. I've been smiling all month as I count down days {and hours now} to my all girls trip to California to hang out with some sweet azz blogging skanks {said in the most loving voice}: JennyKate, Shawn, Vivienne, Becca, Connie and Jen. Meeting CONNIE for the first time is exciting!!!


2. I'm also looking forward to meeting Emmy Mom for lunch on Friday. I LOVE meeting blogging friends!!!


3. French-braiding Emma's hair for the first time makes me smile.

4. Being able to do something nice for a blogging friend {whom I hope to meet IRL} that went through a very tough and tragic situation makes me smile. Love you Date Girl!


5. SUMMERTIME!!! Pool time is finally HERE!

6.  The season finale of Ringer has me smiling and PRAYING that the CW renews it next season. If they don't, I'm DONE with you, CW! DO YOU HEAR ME??


7. Listening to Emma sing songs and say her prayer makes me smile every single night.


8. Finding awesome projects on pinterest for my mom to do for me makes me smile! Emma is in NEED of this adorable time out chair, no?

9. Bonding with all you blogging friends via text, heytell, phone calls, twitter, instagram, snail mail {HAPPY MAIL}, and my new favorite game scramble makes me smile. 


10. Knowing that Emma is completely POTTY trained makes me smile! Now, if we can just work on the pooping. Dear Baby Jesus, please let her poo on the potty. Cleaning out stinky poo from panties every other day makes me gag. AMEN.

So, what makes YOU smile? 

I promise to get back into blogging and reading you more often very soon. I'm working on some funny bits since I've lost my sarcastically funny voice. =(

A Few Confessions....

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It's TUESDAY and that means I'm here to post my one measly weekly post. When will I snap outta this blog funk? My smoking hot IRL friend, Shawn, co-hosts this little linky party with me and we would LOVE for you to link up your Tuesday post with us. Why? BECAUSE WE HAVE NO RULES! =)


I'm feeling like some good healthy confessions are the perfect thing to blog about today. Can you handle them? I'll tame them a little.


I confess that I'm MORE THAN READY to head here:

Huntington Beach, California

to meet up with these ladies:

so we can have a repeat of our amazing Austin trip last year. We leave in 8 days!! There will be silly videos and pictures galore. I'm sure they will only be amusing to us but it won't stop me from posting the craziness on my blog. 


I confess that I'm still a little freaked out after learning that my DAD reads my blog. I talk about totally inappropriate things on here and it's bad enough that my mom reads. So I guess talking about my latest sexy adventures with me and M will be out of the question? Nah. I'll just give him a warning first.


I confess that I shared a Glamour Shots picture {circa 1991} with Boobies, Janette, and Shawn this weekend and now I will share it with you for your enjoyment:

That's me on the left {sporting my FIRST set of braces, mile high hair and thick busy eyebrows}. The other girl took a slightly different road in life than myself. I won't go into details but she's much better now.


I confess that this is the NEW picture of Shawn that pops up when she calls me. Isn't she beautiful? She is going to kill me. =)

Speaking of Shawn, I confess that receiving text messages from her husband over the weekend ended by me threatening his manhood. 

Dear  Mr. Seriously, I DON'T look like Debbie Gibson {eww}, I'm NOT old, I'm NOT into meth heads or swingers, I will NOT dirty talk with you on purpose but I WILL be kicking you in the balls when I see you again. THE END. 

I confess that last night, I totally gave M a DUTCH OVEN! It was great! Not sure what that is? Click HERE. I'm an awesome wife.


Well, I'm outta here for now. Dinner is in the crock pot and I'm off to read a trashy smut book in the sun. I hope you'll be linking up with us today!

I Hate Sad News.

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Hey friends! It's time for my WEEKLY blog post {Gosh I'm such a blog slacker lately} for Talk To Us Tuesday hosted by one of my favorite IRL people, Seriously Shawn and of course myself. If you have a post up or are planning to write a post, link up with us and TALK to us! We love being nosey and the juicier the better! =)


I have to start this TTUT post off with some sad news. If you know or read Date Girl, then you need to know that she delivered her sweet baby girl on Sunday. She was 19 weeks pregnant with her first baby, lovingly nicknamed Roo. She's had complications with bleeding throughout her journey but the doctors told her Roo was fine.


While on pelvic/bed rest and unbeknownst to her, her water broke a couple days prior to Sunday. She started experiencing back labor and Match immediately drove her to the ER. She was then transported via ambulance to a Labor & Delivery hospital nearby. The news was heartbreaking. There was no amniotic fluid and the assumption was the baby would be stillborn, which she was. 


Date Girl got to hold her sweet beautiful baby and sing to her while the nursing staff took pictures and got her hand/footprints. The delivery was quick and effortless. As you can imagine, her and Match are devastated and heartbroken for the baby they were longing to bring home in a few more months. 


If you pray, please pray for comfort and peace. I can not imagine what they are going through. If you have time, please jump over to her post from yesterday by clicking HERE and send her some love. No words will make the pain go away but blogger love is always appreciated. She will be taking a much deserved break. If you don't hear back from her, just know that she's reading your comments and will get back to you when she's ready.


I hate sad news. Don't worry....I'm not ending on that note. I have to give a shout-out to my girl Stacy from Stacy Uncorked. This girl sent me THREE bottles of her own homemade wine! Do you know how excited I am to try it?? I swear, bloggy friends are so thoughtful!

 I'm waiting for a special occasion to come up before I open them. I have a feeling it will be the BEST wine I've ever had! I'll let you know! Thank you again, Stacy!


If you follow me on Instagram, you may have seen these next few pictures.


Check out my big girl getting her teeth cleaned for the 2nd time! She was so good! This makes a momma proud. My advice: The earlier the better. She was too young to be scared.

This is NEVER something you want to see in your rear view mirror:

Don't worry....Emma and/or my cleavage got me out of a ticket. I almost hugged the po-po officer for letting me go with just a warning. 


Do you have an instagram account? Let me know so I can follow you! You can find me at user name one_impulsive_addict. I get on daily. You know I love stalking pictures.


Link up with us and we promise to be your bestest friends! =) Have a great Tuesday!!

I Embarrass Myself For You. You're Welcome.

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Well, it's Tuesday again and I'm blogging for TTUT! I know, I know. I'm sucking it up lately over here but I've got a lot of things going on and I'm trying to find a nice balance between all of my additions. So, just stick with me, ok? I'll be back to "normal" soon I hope! In the meantime, hook up with my gorgeous co-host, Shawn, and myself for a no-rules meme! Who doesn't love that? 


So, I have a short story for this weeks post. I was out of eggs last week and decided to run into CountryMart instead of the dreaded Hellmart because it's way easier and NEVER busy. So, as I'm cruising one of the aisles {holding my nose because this store has a disgusting, dirty feet odor}, I had a little gas that needed to be released. Who doesn't on occasion, right?


Well, I let one rip and it was a little stinky but just so you know, I felt TONS better.


Just as I was about to turn the corner, a family of 4 starts down the aisle. Before I could get out of site, I hear the little boy say "Ewww Mom! That lady farted and it STINKS". 


Oh
Em
Gee.


I grab the eggs, not even checking to see if any were broken, and head to the front for a speedy check out. 


Well, at CountryMart, there is no such thing as a speedy check out. I got stuck waiting on the ONE cashier that was working. Guess who comes up behind me?


That family of 4.


Guess who mentions my stinky fart for all to hear by saying"Mom--there's the lady that farted!"?

That little brat boy better watch his back. 

I will leave you with a family Easter picture we took after church on Sunday. Both grandparents were at our house this weekend and even with the rain, we made it a great holiday weekend! Emma had a blast coloring eggs and finding them hiding around the house and being center of attention was just an extra bonus.

FUN FACT: We set the camera on a green ladder in my front yard so we could do a timed picture. Yes, we are white trash and PROUD.

Dirty Reading Material, Questions Answered and EGG Mail!

Hi friends! It's me! I'm here today because it's.....


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.....and I NEVER miss a TTUT post! Plus, Shawn would get all pissy with me and I don't want that. 


So, obviously, I've been blogging an average of once a week and only visiting you once a week too. I'M SORRY! But I have a good excuse. THIS HAPPENED:

Have you read these? Wow. That's all I can say. I'm 1/2 way through reading the 3rd and final book. I have a very eclectic taste in music and books and this has to be the dirtiest book I've EVER read and I can't put it down!!! I'm reading in ALL my free time. I kind of want to marry Christian Grey. He's got skills. Shhhh!! Don't tell M.

And guess what? Over the weekend, I was out running errands and I decided to take my kindle to do some reading in my car. WHAT?  WHO DOES THAT?? I wanted to be alone and read. No husband interruptions. No Emma interruptions. No in-law interruptions {even though they drove 19 hours to come see us Emma}.

So, there is my excuse. Am I forgiven? 

By they way, I heard someone bought the movie rights. I'm not sure how they can make this movie without an NC-17 rating. Girls, IT IS JUICY! And if you need to liven up your libido, this book should do the trick. I refuse to elaborate further.

Moving on....

Last Tuesday, I asked for questions. I received 3. Here are the questions and my answers.

Allstarme wants to know if I really had to choose, would I choose Gale or Peeta. I've always been Team Gale....especially after seeing the movie. DON'T YOU PEOPLE JUDGE ME!

Miss Vandy wants to know about my favorite kind of underwear. *I'm blushing here* Ok, here is a picture of my favorite sexy undies:

Oh, stop it!! I'm KIDDING!  Here is my REAL favorite. In fact, I had M take a pic of me modeling a pink pair just this morning. Here is my incredibly toned, anti-cottage-cheese azz:

 

My incredibly generous Texas friend who mails me fun goodies, Janette, wants to know if I have a desire to cut my hair for the changing seasons. YES! BUT, I've tried this and I always HATE when I cut my hair and try to change it up. And don't get me started on color changes! SO SCARY! M likes it long, blonde and straight and his opinion is the only one that counts so now you know. Basically, I'M BORING. {But just on the outside!}

And finally....


Emma received an EGG in the mail filled with lots of goodies from my girl, Stacie! Yes people, YOU CAN MAIL EGGS! She LOVED it!!! And now she's addicted to DOTS candy. Thanks for that, Stac. But in all seriousness, thank you! That was so sweet! 

So, what's your Tuesday post about? We would LOVE to read it! Link it up and get ready for some comment love. Come on....I know you wanna! ;-)


*DISCLAIMER* I may be slow getting around to you {the in-laws cramp my blog stalking since I'm all incognito and shiz} but I WILL visit! PINKY SWEAR!